Romances give the wrong impression
Boy meets girl. Boy does an amazing thing for girl. Girl and boy live happily ever after. This is a typical romance novel or movie.
Are you still waiting to be swept off your feet? Well, you shouldn’t be. Or how about waiting for the day you get that firework kiss? It’s probably not going to happen, so stop wishing your life away.
I am all for the sappy chick flicks, believe me; they are the only things I actually enjoy watching. They touch my heart and make me wish those things could happen to me as well, but I’m socially aware enough to not anticipate those types of things.
The appeal of these fictions rarely ever transpose into real life. Girls tend to think that the things portrayed in movies are normal. Relationships are set to higher standards and are given unrealistic expectations on what is anticipated from guys in their real-life relationships. I’m guilty of it, too—a lot of girls are.
I believe this could be a contributing factor to all the two-month relationships that go down the drain in high school. After dating the first guy who makes you feel like a million bucks, the passion seems to run dry, so instead of trying to fix things with their current boyfriend, people part ways so girls can find that “fairy-tale ending.”
Of course, not every relationship is supposed to work out, and every relationship has its problems, but speaking from the female perspective, I feel a lot of conflict has to do with our aspiring for the things we read in Nicholas Sparks’ books.
People need to realize that in real life, there is not an author behind the scenes making sure that happily-ever-after actually follows through. Nobody is calling the shots or controlling our relationships, except for the people in them.
The misunderstandings and misconceptions are not magically cleared up by something clever or that 6-foot-2, tan, baby-blue-eyed, handsome and witty man. True love, like the one in The Notebook, only happens once in a great while. And when it does happen, the couple doesn’t meet by Channing Tatum diving deep into the ocean fetching your purse for you, as seen in Dear John. Girls mostly need to stop setting themselves up for disappointment. Who knows, your life could end up becoming your own movie.
I do believe, however, that these novels and movies let us hold onto that happily-ever-after vision. These movies were obviously made for a reason; relationships like these do happen, but it’s a one-in-a-million chance. When does it become too much though? There are some things a guy should do to make sure his lady feels happy and loved, but those things should be separated from things that are totally far-fetched and would almost never happen.
If you have a soulmate, he will be predestined for you, so stop searching for it. Maybe if Hollywood didn’t implant high expectations for our relationships, people would appreciate the little things. The little things end up being the bigger things in the end.
And, for all those guys wondering why we love watching sappy chick flicks and want you to watch them with us too, take the hint, and learn something.
–By Ally DeJong