Heartbreak: an inevitable part of our lives that we can’t seem to run away from. It stings you, shakes up your whole being and leaves you reaching for anything that you can hold on to. It is a coming of age marker in your life that can either leave you broken or reborn.
At first, I focused on the bad. It was a fresh wound cut deep and I felt pain I had never quite experienced before. I felt numb; the people who I could always count on to make me laugh seemed to lose their essence, I couldn’t cry and no amount of chocolate ice cream in the world could suffice. It was almost as if I were a mindless, soulless shell of a human being, walking about just for the sole purpose of existing. But let me tell you: that horrible feeling in your chest? It goes away. You cannot always control what happens to you, but you can control what you do with it. After I truly learned that, everything changed.
During this period of sheer despair, there will be a time when you will look back and be thankful that certain people, opportunities and things were removed from your life because you would have never found yourself had you not lost them. Sometimes, we get so caught up worrying about what we lost, rather than realizing what we are gaining in its absence.
Heartbreak is like a wake-up call. You know when you are so dead in your sleep, that not even a thunderstorm can wake you? Sometimes it takes somebody to physically shake you in order to wake you up. Well, meet heartbreak, your personal shaker-upper. For a while, you might be upset that it perturbed you, but ultimately, it is a good thing it woke you up, because that life storm was about to obliterate you while you slept. Now, your eyes are open and you are aware of your surroundings. This would be a perfect moment take a good look around the room, because it might be time to do some rearranging.
Heartbreak is an opportunity. An opportunity for you to make some positive changes in your life and recognize that you still have a lot to learn about yourself. Weak people will let it make them bitter and cynical, but those who are strong will break themselves down and then build themselves back up to be even better than they were before. You have to get into perspective and realize that some things end or fail so something bigger and better can begin.
We are young, we make mistakes, we get hurt and we hurt others. This is a convenient thing; sometimes it is good to get hurt. In the end, emotions are palpable proof that we are living. You shouldn’t ask how or when the pain will end; instead, focus on what it is teaching you. Reevaluate what is truly important to you and move on. Will it be easy? No, but it will be so worth it. Ride the emotional roller coaster known as heartbreak, and revel in it, because you are in the process of growing into a better, stronger version of yourself.
Having had time to reflect and get over a hurting heart, I have realized that more good things came out of it than bad. My wounds made me wiser, and I realized that the best is yet to come; this is only a minuscule bump in the road. I also realized that it’s okay, actually impeccable, to set boundaries, and then say, ‘See ya later’ to anyone who doesn’t respect them—without apology.
I wouldn’t have admitted that having your heart broken is a good thing a year ago. In fact, if someone were to tell me back then, “You will someday be grateful for your broken heart,” I would have released an ignorant laugh (or more likely cried) in their face. But I say it now: thank you, dear heart, for being strong enough to fall apart, and allowing me to grow in ways I never imagined.
– By Briana Stone