When someone in your life is lost rather unexpectedly, it can be shocking. It can feel as though a rug has been pulled out from underneath you–a dizzying and sometimes nauseating experience. Grief is not only a feeling or emotion, but also an adjustment to the loss. Grief is a monster that shows up differently in everyone, but it is not a solitary experience. It is important to remember that no one is ever alone in this feeling, and however they react internally is not going to be the same for someone else.
Grief is not a linear, clear process. The 5 stages of grief–denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance–can occur out of order, repeatedly, and it takes time to heal on one’s own terms. There are several ways to find closure, however. Here are 4 methods to cope with grief in a healthy and productive way:
Honor the Person:
One way to find peace in the loss is to find some way to honor your loved one. Hosting a vigil or memorial for anyone familiar with the person can act as both a celebration and a goodbye. You can do this by gathering some nice photos and important objects, and talking about some shared memories.
Find Distractions:
Find some way to inject positive change into your life. Join a new organization, pick up a new hobby or skill, or do something that’s always been on your bucket list. This should be something that is enjoyable and interesting to you, however. Do not force yourself too far out of your comfort zone when in such a vulnerable state.
Take care of yourself:
If you are able to remove any unnecessary source of stress from your life, do it. If a project is too overwhelming at the moment, change it. Your brain and body are very closely connected, and exercise can provide an outlet for intense emotions. Running and biking are the two of the most simple examples, and can be a way to get some fresh air. Yoga is also another way to take care of your body and brain–a quiet, relaxing exercise you can practice without any extra gear.
Meet new people:
When in doubt, find solace in a community. Find those who share and struggle with your same pain and trust them with it. Support groups, both online and in real life, are more plentiful than ever as many people attempt to unpack the scars COVID-19 has left. GriefShare offers several of these sessions, some even right in the heart of Pittsboro.
